Is Your Child A Victim?

If you suspect that your child may be a victim of a bully, you can ask him if he is being teased at school, or ask more open-ended questions, such as 'What do you like to do at recess?' or 'at lunchtime?'

Children are most often bullied at school, usually on the playground or at lunchtime when children are more likely to have minimal supervision, or it may occur in the hallways between classes or on the school bus. In any situation, the better supervised children are, the less likely that bullying will occur.

Children who are bullies may have problems with low self-esteem, but newer theories argue that bullies are driven more by a desire to have power over others and to be 'in control' than because they have poor self-esteem and that they have little empathy for their victims. They may also be aggressive, bossy, controlling, have a low level of self control, and have difficulty making friends. Bullies are also more likely to develop criminal behaviors as adults.

While this may help you understand why a bully acts the way he does, this doesn't necessarily help your child deal with the problem. Things that you should avoid include teaching your child to fight back, since he may get hurt and it may also get him in trouble at school, but that doesn't mean that you can't teach your child to be assertive and to show self-confidence.

Parents often turn to enrolling their children in a martial arts class, and while this can be helpful to build his self-esteem and help him be more assertive, the aim of the classes should not be so that he can fight back.

It may also help to talk with school officials about the problem (so that they can better supervise your child, observe the bully and intervene when necessary) and teach your child to not respond too strongly to the bully (either by crying or giving in to demands), because the bully is more likely to continue bullying your child if he knows that he will get a response.

It may also help to schedule a meeting between the parents of the children involved and school officials.

You can teach your child to walk away (but while staying calm and not running), tell the bully to stop and leave him alone, or to use humor and come up with a good comeback when a bully teases him. It can also help if your child has high self-esteem and if he has some strong friendships, so that he is less of a target. Teaching your child to make eye contact with others (especially the bully) and to talk with a strong voice may also help. Role playing situations where he is bullied may be helpful in teaching how to respond.

It is also important for the bully to understand that bullying is not acceptable and will not be tolerated. If the bullying behavior or other aggressive behaviors persist, then he may need to see a child psychologist for further help.

Also keep in mind that while bullying most often involves boys (both as the bully and victim), girls can also be the victim of bullying and they may bully other children (usually with gossip or isolating someone socially, instead of physical bullying).

It may also help to educate all children about bullying and its consequences. Even if your child is not a victim of a bully, you can teach him to inform an adult if he sees a child being bullied.

You might also was to check out:
School Bullies

School Bullies

Hiba is not even ready for pre-school, and i have already started dreading her getting bullied at school. I remember my days.. although i was never a victim, but i pitied those who were. There was hardly we (as kids) could do at that time, but we did feel sorry for our fellow classmate-victims. Kids are scared when they encounter such things. They don't even dare discuss it with their parents, fearing that it might add to the trouble.
Heres what they had to say about it..
Almost 10% of school age children are the victims of a bully. Bullying is most common by the second grade and then supposedly declines by the high school years. Bullying can be either physical or verbal, and can range from mild teasing to pushing and hitting.

Victims of bullies are usually stereotyped as being loners, passive, quiet, sensitive, anxious, with low self esteem and they are often smaller and/or weaker than other children of the same age and may come from an overprotective home. More importantly, they usually react to bullying by crying, acting out or withdrawing. Some victims may actually bring on the bullying attack by teasing or provoking a bully. Being the victim of a bully can lead to your child avoiding school, and developing fear and anxiety about going to school. It can also cause your child to feel insecure and have feelings of low self worth and poor self-esteem and can ultimately lead to depression and/or violence, either against himself or against the bully. Because victims of bullies often do not seek help or confide in anyone about the bullying, either because of shame or embarrassment or fear that it will be worse if the bully finds out, it is important to look for signs in your children. School avoidance behaviors, especially chronic nonspecific complaints, such as headaches or stomachaches, or they may have trouble sleeping. Also, if your child seems afraid or anxious about going to school, has a change in his personality or his behavior, or a change in his grades, you should consider that he may be a victim of a bully at school, especially if he fits the stereotypes described above.

Healthy Foods Kids Will Eat (Really)!

In simple terms, our daughter HATES eating! She wont have anything other than the ready-to-eat baby foods. I want her to eat everything that we have, like other kids of her age. She sure will taste everything, but wont have it as a main course. While surfing to deal with such conditions, i found this, what Good House found out, hence i found out...

Children all over the country taste-tested "good-for-them" supermarket foods and told us which they'd ask their moms to buy.

Cereal
Welcome news for parents: Some favorites are now available in reduced-sugar versions.
Top kid pleaser: General Mills Reduced-Sugar Trix, praised by one tester for its "good flavors."
Also scooped up: Kellogg's One-Third Less Sugar Froot Loops. Noted a young gourmet, "It's fruity!"
Cereal
Welcome news for parents: Some favorites are now available in reduced-sugar versions.
Top kid pleaser: General Mills Reduced-Sugar Trix, praised by one tester for its "good flavors."
Also scooped up: Kellogg's One-Third Less Sugar Froot Loops. Noted a young gourmet, "It's fruity!"
Top kid pleaser: Casual Gourmet Lightly Seasoned Chicken Burgers. Testers compared these — favorably — to other spicy chicken dinners and to sausage.
Best veggie version: Morningstar Farms Grillers Prime burgers were rated most like a "normal hamburger."
Ice Cream
Kids do scream for ice cream — even some of the new lower-calorie vanillas, we learned.
Top kid pleaser: Edy's Grand Light Vanilla (sold under the Dreyer's brand west of the Rockies).
Stiff competition: Both Breyers Vanilla 2% Milk Light and Healthy Choice Premium Low Fat Vanilla scored high.

I am gonna try all of the above. Maybe SOMETHING works out for us??!

Nutrition for Toddlers and Preschoolers

Children in their toddler and preschool year are very impressionable, which makes it the perfect time to help them form good eating habits. Children are never too young to establish a foundation of good nutrition and healthy eating habits.

Toddlers and preschoolers grow at a slower rate than infants. They need enough energy or calories to fuel their active play and their various stages of growth, but they do not need adult-size portions. Large portions can overwhelm their small appetites and are too big for their small stomachs. Servings for these children should be a quarter to a third the size of an adult portion. Children do not need as much food as an adult. They really only need enough to satisfy their hunger, so listen to their cues. When children say they are done, remove the food or let them leave the table.

Make mealtime enjoyable and pleasant for you and your child and not a source of constant struggle. To help make sure your child eats well, do not allow him or her to drink too many beverages at meals—such as milk, juice, or water—so that they are not hungry for solid foods. Refrain from forcing your child to eat when he or she is not hungry or from forcing unwanted foods. Also avoid giving large amounts of sweet desserts, soft drinks, fruit-flavored drinks, sugarcoated cereals, chips, or candy. These foods have little to no nutritional value and will fill a child up quickly, leaving little room for more nutritious foods.

The following tips can make mealtime more pleasant for both you and your child:

1. Plan a quiet time before meals and snacks. Children tend to eat better if they are relaxed.
2. Encourage children to sit at the table when they eat, and give them plenty of time to eat their meal.
3. Even if you are not eating with your children, sit at the table with them. Young children should be supervised while they eat, to aid in encouragement and in case of choking.
4. Don't use food as a reward or as a punishment. This can lead to unhealthy attitudes toward eating and food.
5. Respect your children's food preferences, and let them choose or reject foods as adults or older children do.
6. Get your children involved in preparing certain parts of the meal. Make every effort to make eating, and not watching television, the main focus of the family meal.
7. Use child-size dishes and utensils that the child can handle with ease. Using too large a plate can be overwhelming.
8. Offer foods with kid appeal. Younger children usually like plain, unmixed foods, as well as finger-foods that make eating easier.
9. Offer plenty of variety from each of the food groups. If your children don't like spinach, don't assume they don't like vegetables. Just offer another vegetable.

Should I worry that my child is not getting enough to eat? Probably not. Children will generally eat when they are hungry and stop when they are full. Young children don't need a whole lot of food and will generally get what their body needs. If you are worried, speak to your pediatrician.

How Much Food Is Enough?
Children do better on an eating schedule. Even though you should offer the child three balanced meals a day, they will probably only eat one or two. Because children have a limited stomach capacity, it is best to feed them five to six small daily meals. Plan nutritious snacks as part of the day's meal schedule. Children's appetites change from day to day, which is completely normal. To help stimulate a good appetite, children should be active and spend time outside in the fresh air. Children will not eat well if they are tired. Schedule mealtimes and playtimes accordingly. It doesn't take much to satisfy a child's small appetite, so plan meals well. If they snack right before a meal, their intake at that meal will not be as good. Children should not be given any food or drink within an hour and a half of a meal. As long as a child is growing normally, he or she is getting enough calories. A child's food intake usually increases just before a growth spurt.

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